{"id":17501,"date":"2020-01-21T22:43:06","date_gmt":"2020-01-21T22:43:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.humnutrition.com\/blog\/?p=17501"},"modified":"2020-01-24T23:43:53","modified_gmt":"2020-01-24T23:43:53","slug":"stop-negative-self-talk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.humnutrition.com\/blog\/stop-negative-self-talk\/","title":{"rendered":"Why You Need to Stop Negative Self-Talk, and How"},"content":{"rendered":"Maybe mirror mantras<\/a> aren\u2019t your thing\u2014and that\u2019s totally cool. Not everyone feels comfortable making eye contact with themselves while repeating affirmations predicting health, wealth, and happiness, let alone believing those positive things are surely heading their way just because the vibe is out there. But the truth is, words embody power. And most self-talk tends to skew towards the negative, according to clinical psychologist Ben Martin<\/a>.\r\n\r\nWords carry weight. Not physical weight, not density, though sometimes it can feel that way when someone puts you down or the rumor mill circles back to you. Words also carry energy, and they can be incredibly effective<\/a> in how you condition yourself. So, whether or not you\u2019re \u201cthere yet\u201d with\u00a0 ultra-positive self-talk, it\u2019s time to stop negative self-talk, stat.\r\n

What Is Self-Talk?<\/h2>\r\n

It’s a Form of Conditioning<\/h3>\r\nIn a way, you could say that self-talk is a way in which we program ourselves. A way of thinking about it is called Neuro-Linguistic Programming<\/a>, which is essentially how the brain processes the language we use to define how we interact with ourselves, situations, and others. Simply put, it\u2019s a strong indicator of how real the mind-body connection is. When we repeat negative self-talk, it accumulates into how we condition ourselves to behave.\r\n

SIDE EFFECTS of NEGATIVE Self-Talk<\/h3>\r\nIt can be physical. Think about when you step out of the shower and glance at yourself in the steamy mirror. Are your daily thoughts disappointment or disgust, presented via insulting adjectives you would never dream of flinging at another person? If so, you’re essentially programming yourself to truly believe you’re the monster you exaggerate yourself to be.\r\n\r\nSelf-talk is also performative. Do you berate yourself with derogatory self-assessments every time you make a mistake? You’re then creating an image of an ignorant person not just inwardly, but outwardly as well.\r\n\r\nSometimes this form of dialogue manifests as sarcasm. We often use self-deprecation as a form of humor to fashion ourselves as relatable, likable, and humble. But too often, we default into this mode and overdo it. It can grow to become the dominating side of our personality to our peers, which can be off-putting and self-defeating. Some psychologists<\/a> argue that a \u201cself\u2010deprecatory \u2018tendency to denigrate\u2019 or \u2018disparage\u2019 oneself\u201d can even be associated with depression and anxiety.\r\n

\"RearHow To STop Negative Self-Talk<\/h2>\r\nOur bodies and body language respond to what we say, even inside our minds. While this influence might seem dangerous or intimidating, it shouldn\u2019t. It just means we wield the power to shift it just as easily.\r\n\r\nBut as simple as it sounds to say something nicer to or about yourself, long-standing patterns<\/a> are not so easy to quit. Breaking the cycle takes dedication and constant awareness. Luckily, there are a few ways to dethrone your inner negativity from its power, which Ben Martin, PsyD, defines as challenging your self-talk<\/a>.\r\n

ReStructure Your Language<\/h3>\r\nThe first step to effectively stop negative self-talk is to recognize your inner critic. Do you often use extremes when talking to yourself, or about yourself to others? If you find yourself scowling, using extreme words and absolutes (e.g., always, never, everyone, nobody), it’s time to quit. First, such proclamations are almost never accurate. And second, they set yourself up for failure in the future because it’s difficult to part ways from your staunch predictions.\r\n

Quit Negative Forecasting<\/h3>\r\nSpeaking of predictions, negative forecasting\u2014or what life coach Jack Canfield<\/a> calls catastrophic predicting\u2014is another form of harmful self-talk. Always assuming the worst is usually a form of protection<\/em> from disappointment, but in reality, actually leaves us in a consistent state of disappointment.\r\n\r\nGet out of constant worst-case-scenario thinking and start planning for things to go well. They won\u2019t always, of course. But positive energy can accumulate to manifest more good than bad, so much so that you\u2019ll start to expect it. Read: Don\u2019t be surprised when good things happen.\r\n

Say Goodbye to Guilt<\/h3>\r\nFinally, unpack your bags; we\u2019re not going on that guilt trip<\/em>. So much negative self-talk is systemic, meaning you\u2019re holding onto baggage from previous mistakes and ruminating on them, assuming that no one has ever forgotten them, and that people you haven\u2019t met yet will probably think the worst of you. Stop hopping on that train to Regretsville and be present<\/a>. Focus on what you\u2019re doing right now\u2014not what you can\u2019t change in the past, or what could go wrong in the future.\r\n\r\nOne final tip: Show yourself the love you’d give to a friend. After all, you\u2019d never let someone talk to your BFF the way you let your inner critic treat you sometimes.\n
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Maybe mirror mantras aren\u2019t your thing\u2014and that\u2019s totally cool. Not everyone feels comfortable making eye contact with themselves while repeating affirmations predicting health, wealth, and happiness, let alone believing those positive things are surely heading their way just because the vibe is out there. But the truth is, words embody power. And most self-talk tends […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":17507,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_toc_level":"h2","_toc_min":2,"footnotes":""},"categories":[825,830],"tags":[7947,164,505,934],"coauthors":[],"class_list":["post-17501","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mind","category-mood","tag-bad-habits","tag-self-care","tag-self-esteem","tag-self-love"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhy You Need to Stop Negative Self-Talk, and How | HUM Nutrition Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Sarcasm and self-deprecation won't get you where you want to be. 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